Chapter 6 in The Geek Leader’s Handbook discusses the topic of toxic teams and how to deal with them. What really interested me was how toxicity rises in teams, and how we can heal (or attempt to heal) and already toxic team. I have had experience with toxic people so I will be sharing some of my personal experiences about this. I’m sure everyone has had an experience of working within a toxic team, or having a relationship with someone who is toxic so this should be nothing new.
HOW TEAMS (AND PEOPLE) BECOME TOXIC
It sucks having someone who is toxic in your life. Instead of taking enjoyment from their company, they drain you. Being in a team full of toxic people is just as bad. People aren’t born this way, so how can a person become toxic? During my research I found this very useful YouTube video about how to tell if your in a toxic relationship.
I chose this video because I love how they explain the behaviors of both the toxic individual and the person being affected in the situation. I like the visuals because it adds a whole new realm to get the message across. Now imagine working with a whole team full of toxic people. Now that, would be a nightmare. According to help-me-change.com these are the top characteristics of toxic people listed below.
Here are some of the main characteristics of toxic people:
• Toxic people drain you of your energy.
• They find fault with everything.
• They complain, whine, and blame.
• They are extremely judgmental.
• They are self destructive.
• They do not recognize your boundaries.
• They don’t see their negative traits.
In my life I have been in my fair share of toxic relationships. It’s hard to be with someone who puts you down and makes you feel unwanted, but I stayed because I felt obligated. This is a mistake I will never make again. Never hangout with someone who makes you feel less than human, or drains you just by being there. Toxic people will do that to you. It’s hard to get out of relationships like that because they always try and find a way to pull you back. There are so many other people in the world so if something just isn’t working even though you tried to fix it I learned to just move on. I never regret the experiences I’ve been through because it taught me that I am worth it, and I deserve better. No one deserves to go through that.
HOW TO DEAL WITH TOXIC TEAMS (AND PEOPLE)
On Forbes there is an article that tackles this question, “Why Teams Turn Toxic, and How to Heal Them”. There are many different ways to fix toxic relationships. Sometimes you have to stand up and confront them , and other times you just have to break free. Its always good to try and communicate with them before you think of breaking the relationship off completely, unless your in a dangerous situation of course. I really found the Forbes article interesting because it gave some very useful tips on how to start the healing process in relationships such as this.
To leave you off I would like to share a video I found that is a perfect example of a toxic person in a humorous way. If you haven’t heard of Key and Peele before then you have been missing out. While some of their videos are just plain explicit, this one does have some language but is still super funny. I chose this because this thug is extremely toxic because of his pride. He won’t ever admit he is wrong which ends badly for him. Watch and Enjoy!